IM with Coop

Coop: want to have phone sex
SwankiVY2: Oh, you mean like you call me up and I tell you what I'm wearing and we masturbate together?
Coop: yes
SwankiVY2: Hm. Wait, do you have any pets?
Coop: no
SwankiVY2: Why not?
Coop: i dont know. do you want to or not i need to get off
SwankiVY2: I was figuring if you're that hard up for sex you ought to ask your cat or dog to get laid . . . since you at least would know them. Why don't you fuck the bathroom sink? I've heard that's fun until you try to remove your schlong.
Coop: so this is a no
SwankiVY2: I could be a little boy!
SwankiVY2: What if I was a little boy?
SwankiVY2: Then you'd sure feel dumb.
SwankiVY2: First they offer crack to kids, now phone sex to little boys. . . .
SwankiVY2: You're a pervert, mister.

Comment on this loser!

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Comments from others:

Mikey: I think that this one had pets and they will no longer be abused, animal rights got to them I hope and he is now banned from all petting zoos "them poor goats." And as for the sink well this most likely wouldn't work either as the orifice for his *shlong* would be too wide and he would be unable to feel anything perhaps a hole from a thumb tack might do even a piece of fruit as these can't talk unless you are coop then you hear all their sexy talk. "I would guess that his favorite is a banana or perhaps a cucumber." Hey he's generous and gives them a so called reach around.

Lisa: What a pervert. It's sad how a lot of bored people online seem to think that everyone wants to cyber. Stupid pervs. =)

DiLL: Just because this guy came out of nowhere and asked for personal satisifaction with someone HE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW, I pray that his bathroom sink is really old and has random jarring fragments of lead tearing open his wanker and the blood squirting out would create a powerful suction like effect so no matter how hard he tried he couldn't get it out, only making the situation worse by scraping lead into his body and poisoning himself thus dying with his dick stuck in the weirdest place. That would be a front page story, would it not? Pictures and everything! I can see it now! "Man's horniness results in death! The body could not be freed because of Rigor Mortis! After a few hours, an autopsy will be preformed to ensure that it was lust that killed him, or that it was the most bizzarre suicide America has ever seen!" Then us Canadians would laugh, then shake our heads and look away in shame. Why am I so mean??? I just wished this guy to die! Oh well. It's not like the world would be a better place without these kind of people... oh wait, yes, yes it would. :P

antiflagjoe: hope that jackass wuz scarred for life and scared shitless. (:

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